Thursday, January 3, 2019

Adult Party 8-tracks

I hope you're all still having your new year's party, because the party isn't over if you haven't played any of these PARTY 8-TRACKS!!!

But not all is lost if you ended your party shortly after midnight on January 1st. For those of you who made a new years resolution to masturbate more and have more porn in your life, I'll happily help you with that. Well... not literally.

I must have been in the wrong place when I was transferring these. My usual cafe that I blog at (mainly made up of bible students) was closed over the holidays, so I ventured into a mostly Asian cafe and got strange looks from the people around me playing with their iPhones while I was playing my 8-tracks.

Anyway, let's check out these tapes. Be forewarned that clicking on the images uncensors them. This stuff is NSFW!

Forgive Me Father for I Have Sinned

I generally expect that when I buy an 8-track that says "Party Tape", it's going to be pornographic. This one is not. It's just some vulgar comedy tape. I didn't care to listen to the whole thing. I just listened to a chunk of program 4, copied whatever I heard, and that's pretty much all you need from this one.

Listen to Forgive Me Father For I Have Sinned

Sensuous Men and Women

I had a terrible time trying to get this fucking tape to play properly. Outside of putting it in a new shell, I got it playing decently with the occasional warble in it. It was obviously played a lot, and who knows what kind of a sick bastard owned it before me.

According to the label, I've never heard a recording so real. I call bullshit on that. This tape is purely ficticious and has a cast of nasty sounding people. There is pretty much nothing sensuous about this recording.

Listen to Sensuous Men and Women

How To Do It

Now we're talking!

There's a common plot with a lot of these tapes. Somebody goes to a therapy session and tells the therapist (with great detail and sound effects) about their sexual adventures. Within the first minute, you get to hear the award-winning expression, "I felt hotter than a fresh fucked fox in a forest fire". You know you're in for one hell of a ride after hearing a phrase like that!

This is the best tape of the lot, and if your parents are gone to bed, feel free to play this while they're sleeping to really mess with their dreams.

Listen to How To Do It

Well, hopefully you haven't creamed all over your computer from listening to these albums, unlike me.